Anna Maria Locke

My favorite books for an empowered, holistic, and calm pregnancy

2019Anna Locke
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Once you get pregnant you quickly discover there are a billion books on pregnancy, not to mention the dark hole of the internet! And when your body is going through so many unfamiliar changes every single day, it’s tempting to become all-consumed with learning and Googling every twinge or weirdness. And then you discover that almost everything and everyone will give you conflicting evidence, which means you can’t just be told what to do but have to be as informed as possible while ultimately trusting your own intuition… which no one really teaches us how to do.

Most books and resources focus on the physical aspects of baby and your body, but I knew I wanted to focus on the mental, emotional, and spiritual side of this sacred time.

I’m a Type A planner and love reading and learning, so I’ve burned through a ton of pregnancy books over the last year. I recommend checking them out of the library if they’re available to see which ones you love most, and save your money for a cute maternity outfit that makes you feel gorgeous.

My personal philosophy around pregnancy and motherhood is a combo of science and “woo” -- I like knowing the evidence based studies and also strongly believe in the power of alternative medicine and energy work. Give me the facts, and then let me trust my intuition.

If you’re interested in a conscious pregnancy, mind/body/spirit, here are my favorite books that are worth spending money on! They also make fabulous baby shower gifts for your sister or friend.

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5 great books for a conscious, holistic, and calm pregnancy

Expecting Better by Emily Oster

Don’t eat turkey sandwiches! Keep your heart rate below 140! Avoid caffeine and alcohol at all costs! There are so many random rules we hear from doctors and society about what we can and can’t do while pregnant, and a lot of them are conflicting. What’s the deal, and what actually matters? Written by an economist, Expecting Better is data driven and evidence based. The author combs through hundreds of scientific studies to verify what is actually proven fact and what is simply outdated policies or old wives tales when it comes to all the advice and rules you’ll come across. If you are prone to anxiety and like facts and figures to make your own empowered decisions, this book will be incredibly reassuring!

Nurture: A Modern Guide to Pregnancy, Birth, Early Motherhood and Trusting Yourself and Your Body by Erica Chidi Cohen

Written by a doula, this book is basically like taking an in-depth holistic childbirth education class. While it trends towards the more natural route, the tone is very positive and neutral (i.e. no shame vibes if you choose or require interventions or medication during labor and delivery).

The sections on each trimester are pretty brief, but the sections on the stages of labor including different positions and comfort measures are the best I’ve found.

I would use this book as a resource for labor, birth, and early motherhood, less of a pregnancy resource.

Birth Without Fear: The Judgment-Free Guide to Taking Charge of Your Pregnancy, Birth, and Postpartum by January Harshe

Pregnancy and childbirth is incredibly overwhelming, and no one warns you about the mental and emotional changes that happen when your hormones go haywire. This book normalizes EVERYTHING through a self care lens.

The author is the founder of the Birth Without Fear movement and has 6 kids. It seems like she’s experienced every type of delivery under the sun from C-section to homebirth and she keeps it real.

There are chapters on pregnancy, every type of delivery you can imagine, postpartum, input from her husband for the partner’s perspective, sample birth plans for every scenario, it’s fantastic and incredibly empowering.

Bountiful Beautiful Blissful: Experience the Natural Power of Pregnancy and Birth with Kundalini Yoga and Meditation by Gurmukh Kaur Khalsa

This Kundalini resource might be a little out there for most people, but it is the most incredible guide if you like meditation and are interested in approaching pregnancy and childbirth as a spiritual journey (which I strongly believe it is!)

Kundalini is a Sanscrit term from ancient India that identifies the arising of an energy and consciousness. This book takes you on a journey through pregnancy from that perspective, so the meditations are calming but also active as you assume various mudras or arm/hand positions. Instead of simply calming your mind, you will reset your entire nervous system. Each chapter is a short reflection that makes me feel extremely grounded, calm, grateful, connected to my baby, all the warm fuzzy feelings that are so important and an antidote to the stress and anxiety of pregnancy in the modern age.

You will have a much deeper appreciation of the celebratory, deep and powerful initiation you’re going through as you grow a new life!

Real Food for Pregnancy: The Science and Wisdom of Optimum Prenatal Nutrition by Lily Nichols, RDN, CDE

If you’re interested in learning about nutrition during pregnancy, this is the only food book you need.

I bought it because I thought it was going to be a cookbook, but it turns out it’s a comprehensive guide to a healthy pregnancy through a nutrition perspective. It’s also the most heavily researched and evidence based book I’ve ever seen -- there are almost 1,000 references in the index !! It feels like an accessible and practical textbook on prenatal nutrition and food based prenatal care.

A couple important things to note:

She takes a meat centered, low carb -- almost paleo -- approach to nutrition so if you’re vegetarian or vegan, this is not the book for you. 

If you have a complicated emotional relationship with food, it might trigger you into negatively controlling or perfection mindset.

I ended up loving the book but pretty much ditched the majority of her advice on meal planning and eating because I’ve had strong aversions to animal protein and vegetables through my entire pregnancy. My body has craved carbs and I don’t feel satisfied or energized without making them my main food group, so I’ve been taking a more intuitive approach to food and allowing myself a more relaxed approach without guilt.

That being said, I still highly recommend at least checking out the book out of the library, maybe either super early in your pregnancy or in your second trimester once your morning sickness and nausea has passed.

If you end up being diagnosed with gestational diabetes, it is a fantastic resource, as well as her book Real Food for GD.

The Fourth Trimester: A Postpartum Guide to Healing Your Body, Balancing Your Emotions, and Restoring Your Vitality by Kimberly Ann Johnson

If you only get one book while pregnant, make it this one! And gift it to all your pregnant friends!

We are so consumed with pregnancy and birth, no one talks about the biggest transition of all, the postpartum period! We assume postpartum is the first 6 weeks or so after delivery and then we are cleared to workout, have sex, go back to work, and continue life as usual right? HA.

It’s kind of like getting so obsessed with planning every detail of your wedding that you forget it’s only one day, and then it’s over, and you realize the actual focus should be on prepping for marriage because you now have to spend the rest of your life with this person.

At the end of the day, the 9-10 months of pregnancy go by so fast, and active labor and delivery last at most a few days. Why aren’t we planning and preparing for how to heal and recover and learn how to take care of a new human for the rest of its life?

This book covers all that, a practical and encouraging guide to setting yourself up for a smooth-as-possible transition into motherhood. Not just the weird things that happen to your body but also the mental and emotional challenges of dealing with the biggest hormone crash of human existence while simultaniously healing from physical trauma/major abdominal surgery and trying to feed a human with your body all on extreme sleep deprivation (which in itself is used as a method of torture !!)... and learning how to ask for and receive support which is a giant challenge for women.

I recommend getting it by your second trimester so you have plenty of time to read and absorb in small doses to avoid complete overwhelm. But overall the tone is normalizing and empowering and will make you feel way more prepared for what’s to come.

You’ve got this, mama!

xo Anna

How to overcome the fear of judgment and be unapologetically true to yourself

2019Anna Locke
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Earlier this summer I shared a blog post on the two basic fears that pop up for all entrepreneurs as we start to launch ourselves and our work... but I never told you how to actually get over yourself. Until now! :)

Anytime we go out of our comfort zone or navigate a new life transition, we make ourselves emotionally vulnerable and that opens up a lot of fear.

One of the main fears that my clients (and I) struggle with is the fear of judgment.

“What will people think?”

The only way to truly overcome a fear is to move through it with action and prove to yourself that it holds no power over you.

But sometimes we need to build up our courage and confidence first and this is where a little self coaching comes in.

Today I'm sharing a quick and powerful tool for immediately diffusing fear of judgment or overly caring what other people think.

This will make you uncomfortable. It’s safe to get uncomfortable, in fact it’s the only way to grow and evolve as a human.

But first - the backstory of why this topic is so personal to me!!

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This picture was taken last Thursday. I was riding in the car with my friends Amanda and Anna, on our way to Indianapolis for Beachbody Coach Summit, blasting Disney tunes and singing at the top of our lungs.

What do you see?

Three girls on a road trip having fun, right?

Well, that’s pretty much the truth, but a picture is worth a thousand words and captured in this image I see so many things I used to hold fear of judgment around:

-being part of a network marketing company
-singing out loud in front of other people
-reaching out to strangers on Instagram and inviting them into my business
-opening my heart and making new friends as an adult
-being my quirky spazzy emotional introverted self

If I had let my fears stop me, I wouldn’t be here today: 5 years into my business, 9 months into a healthy active pregnancy, about to be able to stay at home with my baby and still earn income online, able to travel all over anytime I want to attend personal development and leadership events with inspiring people, part of a community of positive and ambitious women who support me and share my vision..

I think it’s completely normal to care about what other people think of you, because humans are pretty judge-y. Plus going through a major life transition or launching an authentic, heart centered business is the ultimate act in vulnerability and it IS going to feel uncomfortable. So get used to it babe! It’s all part of the game. Not a sign that something is wrong.

What IS wrong is if you let your fear of what other people will think hold you back from living true to your heart (per the Mulan song) and making life decisions on your own terms.

Ready to get out of your own way? Here is what I do:

How to diffuse fear of judgment in 10 minutes or less

  • Take out a pen and paper and make a list of names: who SPECIFICALLY are you afraid is going to judge you?

  • If it’s random strangers on the internet: let them go! You don’t even know them.

  • If it’s family or  friends:

    • What specifically do you think they judging you for?

    • Does their opinion matter?

    • Does their judgment change what you believe in, or the mission you’re sharing with your business?

  • Maybe you’ll realize there is no one at all, and you’re actually only judging yourself because you don't really believe in yourself yet, in which case it's time to get clear on your mission and purpose!

Self awareness is the biggest step you can take in getting out of your own way.

The world needs you to show up and shine!

xo Anna

p.s. click here to sign up for my weekly encouragement and free resources!

Life update from the third trimester trenches

2019Anna Locke
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It’s July, summer weather has finally arrived, I am sequestering myself in the air conditioning and sitting on my bouncy ball as I type this long overdue life update!

Click here to read my first trimester recap. I never shared an official second tri blog post but all you need to know is that I felt great, it was amazing, etc etc :)

“How are you feeling?” is the question everyone asks me, so in case you’re wondering…

I’ll be 35 weeks pregnant tomorrow, and physically I’m feeling way better than I expected at this point which has been a huge relief! I’ve been trying to get out for a walk almost every day but I can’t make it more than 1-2 miles without needing to pee, and I can’t workout AND go for a 2+ mile walk in one day or I will be too exhausted to function, but I’ve had several months to adjust to my new default state of SLOW so my lack of energy hasn’t really been bothering me.

My favorite part of pregnancy is feeling the baby move inside, allthetime. It started with tiny popcorn pops that felt like a muscle twitch in week 16/17, then stronger and stronger kicks and flutters, and now I can watch my entire belly distend as a little butt and legs shift from side to side. It’s so crazy and surreal!

So far I’ve escaped a lot of the typical pregnancy side effects like swelling and heart burn, but I’ve been dealing with low back pain since first trimester. You know the pinched nerve feeling when you just need to crack your spine? Except I can’t crack my spine and it never goes away. I’m sure this is due to my pelvis and joints relaxing, but I’ve been seeing a chiropractor since week 23ish which has helped a lot. It comes and goes, this week actually has been pretty good. I have to make sure to stay off my feet as much as possible. I’ve gained almost 25 pounds, most of which is concentrated in my belly, so that doesn’t help either.

It’s crazy how much your belly squishes your internal organs. I’m feeling it the most in my bladder, stomach, and lungs. I can’t eat a full meal or I will feel sick for hours, and I can’t take a full breath. I’ve read everywhere about feeling short of breath during pregnancy, but this is different than the winded feeling of the first trimester, when hormones and increased blood volume made me feel like walking up the stairs was a sprint. I’m used to feeling winded and out of breath. This feels like there’s someone constantly putting pressure on my chest so my lungs physically can’t expand. It’s the same feeling I used to get when I had an anxiety attack, which triggers my nervous system to respond by jacking up my heart rate and anxiety levels. Not helpful!

Speaking of anxiety, the anxiety is real. 

I want to be honest about the mental and emotional challenges of pregnancy because no one really prepped me for this, and it’s easy to start to feel very isolated like something is wrong or you should just “get it together” and be grateful and happy to be pregnant.

I’ve been crying almost every day over the last couple weeks.

Sometimes I cry even though nothing in particular is wrong. It’s definitely hormone driven because it feels exactly like I used to feel when I had a PMDD episode back in college.

On top of the hormones, I’m extra sensitive and emotional in that all my emotions are amplified.

It’s like subconsciously my intuition can sense there’s a massive life change and transition happening, and even though I know I am supported, safe, and as prepared as possible for this change, it’s still completely overwhelming.

Overwhelmed is the best word I can use to describe it.

Overwhelmed by love, joy, gratitude, but also by fear of the unknown, stress about money and business, just all the feels.

It doesn’t help that I’m an Enneagram 4, which is the personality type notorious for being overly attached to my emotions and feelings. I FEEL IT ALL! The only way to process is to cry it out and let it pass.

It literally feels like a storm moving through me and I am always calm afterwards, I just have to surrender and not fight it or judge myself.

I’m learning how to fully embrace my emotional side and feel the feels without rationalizing them (and letting go of my fear that everyone I love will leave me if I exhibit weakness/sadness/neediness). Actually, the best thing we can do is fully embrace the feels and let the overwhelm overwhelm us. Emotions always pass, and I always feel calmer and more resilient afterwards.

Life is hard. Change is hard. It’s ok to take space to process it all.

Food and cravings

Still leaning towards sweet foods and dealing with a veggie aversion. Have been eating lots of ice cream and my go-to meal to make for myself for lunch if I feel blah is french toast.

third trimester baby shower

A couple weeks ago we celebrated a baby shower with our Chicago friends, which was really fun to bring all our friend groups together and we were overwhelmed with love and generosity.

Since we don’t have immediate family nearby except Ben’s sister and brother in law (soooo grateful for that!), I’ve been more appreciative than ever of our friends and community we’ve built here in Chicago over the last 7 years.

Up until we started trying to get pregnant I was desperate to leave the city and move somewhere more outdoorsy with a slower pace of life, but I can’t see us uprooting anytime soon now that we are growing our family, and I’m actually getting really excited to raise a kid in Chicago. It’s going to be so different from my own childhood in the valleys and cornfields of central IL! Crazy how life evolves, sometimes you just have to go with it and bloom where you’re planted.

Business and work

The hardest part of pregnancy so far has been trying to figure out how to navigate my business and work to honor my limited capacity, allow me to focus on the pregnancy, but also pay the bills. As a solopreneur, I’m incredibly grateful I have the flexibility to make my own hours and take off as much time as I want to be home with our baby, but on the flip side it’s created a lot of stress around financial stability.

I’ve always worried about money -- it’s how deeper fears manifest for me. Kind of like how some women fixate on the number on the scale or numb out with emotional eating when their weight isn’t the real problem but rather the deeper feeling of being out of control or feeling shame and worthlessness.

I don’t know what life with a baby will look like but I know I’m going to be exhausted and preoccupied especially for the first few months so I’m trying to work ahead as much as I can.

I’ve wrapped up my 1:1 client work, and have created a couple new digital products to offer including my mindset trainings Fear & Flow and Let It Happen, and my signature digital program Wild Synchronicity. I’m extremely proud of myself for creating these, even if launching has been a little slow and discouraging so far.

My plan for this month is to batch create content and blog posts, and schedule a series of automated emails and newsletters so I can still add value and nurture my list, and hopefully make the transition back to work a little smoother once I’m ready to take on 1:1 life coaching clients again this fall. If you aren’t already subscribed to my email list, click here to sign up — I have lots of really great content on mindset, overcoming fears, self care, feminine energy, and navigating life and business as a spiritual entrepreneur lined up!

If you’re interested in working together, you can click here to join my waitlist if you’d like to know when I have client openings for life coaching again. I’m planning to raise my rates this winter, so if you want to lock in my current rates, the waitlist is the best place to be.

Gratefully, I’ve been able to build up a dependable residual income with my Beachbody business, so I know I’ll be able to at least contribute to bills and expenses without being “on” or actively working, but I haven’t been able to save up as much as I wanted and have a bit of standing credit card debt that’s annoying the heck out of me as my life coaching income disappears for now.

The most frustrating part is seeing and feeling my potential for earning, but not having the mental and emotional bandwidth to WORK! Which is triggering feelings of scarcity (I am not doing enough/earning enough/being enough//need to work harder/do more).

Slowing down

Slowing down physically is one thing, but slowing down mentally and energetically is tough.

The way hormones are affecting my brain chemistry, it feels like I’m constantly distracted by something else as if I’m multi-tasking (which makes sense because I am and it’s called 3D PRINTING A HUMAN), so it takes an enormous amount of energy to focus on one thing. Like writing this blog post… I’m letting the words flow stream of conscious style and am not even going to worry about editing it.

Well, Ben is home and it’s time to kick off the holiday weekend! I’m going to make these cupcakes tonight for our 4th of July cookout tomorrow. That’s another great thing about pregnancy — I’ve given myself full permission to enjoy all the not so healthy treats that I want, and have never felt this free in my body and around food!

Have an amazing weekend, and happy summer!

xo Anna