July Life Update: Finding Calm in the Chaos

The above quote is my mantra right now. I'm doing my best to play the role of grand adventurer rather than fall back into overwhelm and victim mode because life is a little chaotic and staying focused has been a challenge! I feel most calm and in control when I have a dependable, predictable routine, and I don't think I've had a routine all summer with all our traveling and general life transitions going on.

I'm in the middle of a two week travel-free period, but instead of taking a breather to reground my life, we are MOVING! On Thursday, woohoo! We've been talking about moving into a nicer apartment for over a year, but it's always been this vague "oh wouldn't that be nice" thought in the back of my head. Now our apartment is in utter chaos with boxes everywhere, so I can't really ignore it any longer. It's official!

Between 2011 and 2012, Ben and I each moved at least 4 times, all around the country as we finished school and searched for full time jobs that were in the same zip code. It was a really crazy period full of uncertainty, so when Ben finally accepted a teaching position in Chicago three summers ago, we landed in the first apartment that caught our eye and have been here ever since.

It was a tough move for me. The day we moved in, Ben had to report to his new job, so I was the one tasked with deep cleaning and unpacking all our stuff. It was also the first time Ben and I had officially lived together and combined households, the previous tenants weren't the cleanest people in the world (to put it nicely), AND it was the first time I'd moved to a big city, so combine the stress with being 2 months out from our wedding and job hunting...yeah ok it was pretty damn stressful and I'm just glad I've made it through to the other side!

We love our neighborhood (Roscoe Village) and our 19th century walk-up has been a great first apartment, but we're more than ready to move onwards and upwards! I'm particularly ready for a fresh start, since there are so many intense memories in our current place. It's never really felt like home for me, because I haven't allowed myself to take ownership of it. (Back to that "victim" mode...). This sounds kind of dumb, but I've always held myself back and told myself I'm not worthy of having the beautiful, well designed home of my Pinterest dreams. I tell myself we can't afford to decorate, that buying pillows and furniture is a waste of money, and I've been battling this broke/struggle mentality ever since we moved to Chicago.

It's three years later though, and we've come so far. Especially me. I feel like I've grown up. I've discovered my purpose, learned how to trust myself, and am starting to extricate myself from the broke/struggle/failure victim mentality, although we're still living in the old apartment that I've given up on. I know my environment plays a huge role in my mood and self esteem, so I'm super excited to have a new home that actually matches where I'm at in my head right now!

I think I'm most excited about our kitchen upgrade. AHHHH!!! Stainless steel, granite counters, and more than one drawer??!! I officially feel like an adult now.

In other news, Ben and I are soaking up our last few weeks of summer before he goes back to school! We're trying out the new restaurants that have opened up on our neighborhood before we leave, and we're getting back in our church groove now that all our big trips are behind us. 

I don't think I've talked a lot about this, but last year we discovered and joined an amazing church community (Wicker Park Lutheran) and it's been like the missing link to my life. Just having a sense of belonging and a spiritual outlet is so important to me. This weekend we helped staff the booth at Wicker Park Fest, a great people watching opportunity ;) And we also checked out the 606, the new elevated path/park that runs through the city.

So that's the life update for now. Just trying to remain calm, enjoy summer, stay focused on my business goals, and take in all the changes that are happening!

I've discovered that it's so important to be proactive with carving out quiet time to take care of myself physically and emotionally, especially when life gets crazy. I've been waking up extra early lately to journal, read some personal development, and workout before plugging in for the day. It's easy to get sucked into "reactive mode," putting demands, to-do's, and other people's needs and agendas first, but I've been learning that it's ok not to respond to messages and emails immediately, and that I am always in control of how I feel and react to a situation!

I just finished Gabby Bernstein's Spirit Junkie and unexpectedly found myself skimming through most of the book and resonating the most with the very end of her story, which was a sign that I've come a LONG way on my own inner emotional/spiritual path. She inspired me to finally buy the entire A Course In Miracles, and I'm looking forward to digesting it this fall because I've been craving more peace, more inner stillness, more calm. I'm officially saying adios to the fear, doubt, anxiety, and insecurity that's plagued me for so long. 

I'm still figuring out the direction I want to take my coaching business, but I know for certain it involves helping women overcome the inner blocks and fear that holds us back from living up to our true capacity and loving ourselves. Stay tuned for tons more biz updates, wellness programs, and more! I'm brimming with ideas and mojo.

I hope you're able to find your own version of calm in the summer whirlwind. If you ever want to chat about life, I'm here for ya :) 

xo Anna

The Truth About Balance

It’s a warm Friday morning and I’m sitting in my camp chair in the corner of my tiny front porch, this little corner I call my “summer office,” trying to calm my brain and organize my thoughts.

Ever since I got back from Nashville and my first Coach Summit last Sunday night, I’ve been riding this non-stop adrenaline and endorphin fueled high and can’t seem to calm down.

I’ve even stopped drinking coffee this week, but I still feel like I’ve downed a triple shot espresso at all times. I’m trying my best to stay grounded, stay present, take deep breaths, and remind myself that I’m exactly where I need to be, and that there’s no rush to get everything done even though I’m so fired up and want to do all the things RIGHT NOW!

This is a 180 opposite to how I’ve felt the majority of this summer so far. To be honest, I’ve been feeling pretty lazy with Ben at home on summer break, and my motivation to grow my business and make things happen has been at an all time low until now. Well, after hanging out with my coaches, absorbing the ridiculously intense energy of 25,000 other highly successful and motivated people, and having our brains and hearts blown wide open, the motivation is officially back and I’m so excited and anxious to implement all the amazing ideas and training I soaked up last week. BUT the structure and routine is still out the window, especially since we’re also in the process of packing up our apartment to move next Thursday! Am I doomed to live an all-or-nothing life? I don’t know. I’m still determined to find a sense of balance within the chaos.

This entire summer has been such a whirlwind of travel and change and growth.

This is life.

The thing is, I like to feel in control. I’ve been working to get better at letting things go, but it’s hard at times like this.

Everyday I strive to find some level of balance. Work/life balance, healthy balance, family/biz balance, introvert/social balance, it’s a never ending quest especially if you tend to be an “all or nothing” person like me.

Do you struggle with balance too? I bet you do.

Sometimes it's about little things like trying to find the balance between the desire to have abs and the desire to eat ice cream. Sometimes it's bigger, like balancing a career with wanting to have children. We're constantly bombarded with messages about how we have choices, but we also have pressure to do it all and do it perfectly.

Have you ever stopped to think about if it’s actually possible to “achieve balance” in all areas of life?

Because I’ve been thinking about it a lot over the past year, especially since I quit my job and started working for myself.

It’s easy to throw the word around, but I think it’s really important to dig a little deeper into what we ACTUALLY need or want when we’re striving for any type of balance.

Does balance mean spending equal amounts of time or energy on every aspect of life? Nope. Because that would be impossible.

Life goes by in seasons, in cycles, in a never-ending wave of time and energy and highs and lows. Some seasons are for growth, and some are for withdrawal and renewal. Some are for lazy summer days, some are for busting your butt to hit milestones with your career.

The secret to feeling fulfilled is realizing that you can’t do it all, all at once, and you can’t freak out when some things that used to be a priority fall to the back burner.

My amazing mother-in-law Pat told me a great analogy once. She described life as a tapestry, and all the stories and people and events in your life are like different colored threads. Sometimes certain threads come to the forefront and create the picture, but the rest of the threads are still there, hidden behind the weave yet still a part of the cloth as a whole, waiting for their turn to come back to the forefront.

Last week, before I left for Nashville, I knew that this trip would be a turning point for my life and career, and I knew that my motivation and energy would return afterwards. So I let myself feel lazy and unmotivated guilt-free because I knew it was only a phase. Learning how to trust myself, acknowledge my feelings, and respond to my energy levels instead of trying to beat them into submission has been one of the biggest accomplishments this year.

Don’t force things that just need some time. The more aware we are of our bodies and energy, the more we surrender to the season or phase we’re in, the easier things start to fall into place without even trying. Don’t push through. Just let go.

I’m still working on my own personal definition of “balance,” but I think it goes something like this:

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Balance is the active process of becoming emotionally resilient to the rollercoaster of life.

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Balance is not something we can achieve or force or check off a to-do list. It's incredibly personal and involves developing an awareness of your body and what you need in the present moment to stay focused on what's really important.

Sometimes it's about waking up early to work out, and sometimes it's about staying up late to drink wine with a friend. Sometimes it's about being the best mother you can be to your kids, sometimes it's about focusing on yourself. We don't have to "do it all" to "have it all," but we do have the power to tune into our own needs and take control instead of letting the demands of life take the wheel.

One easy way to feel more balanced? Wake up 20 minutes early and journal or go for a walk BEFORE you check your email or rush off to work. Try it and let me know how it goes!

Feel all your feelings, high and low. Ride the waves. Trust yourself.

So yeah. It might not be "the" truth about balance, but it's my truth right now.

• Do you struggle with balance?
• What does it feel like to you?

xo Anna

Coach Summit 2015 Recap

Wow.

I'm trying really hard to get back in my blogging groove and normal routine, it feels like all I can manage is trip re-cap after trip re-cap!

(I've been microblogging my day to day life on Instagram + Facebook...let's be friends?)

Does anyone else feel like this summer is going by in a whirlwind?

I guess that's usually the way it goes. Long days and nights, travel, a busy schedule that floats by at a hectic yet relaxed pace, one day and week at a time, hopping from weekend to weekend and trip to trip until your routine and schedule are completely blown to bits and all you can do is pour another margarita, take a deep breath, and enjoy the ride.

I've been marinating on this blog post since I came home from my trip to Nashville on Sunday night, struggling to put my heart into words. If I know I have to get something big off my chest, I feel anxious and restless and distracted until I sit myself down and do the work. So I'm sitting down right now on my front porch and writing until my head and heart are at peace again. I have SO much to share.

Literally my view right now. 

I feel blown open, breathless, like the last piece of the puzzle I've been working on all year has clicked into place.

It's no secret that I've been working HARD to overcome a ton of inner resistance, perfectionism, fear, and self doubt this year to learn how to trust myself and believe in my dreams. Inner work is hard. It's emotional. I'm not trying to change, but rather uncover who I really am underneath all the layers and labels I've pasted over my heart as I've struggled to find my place in the world.

How do I describe how it feels to finally know that I'm living my purpose? That I am HERE, I've arrived, I don't have to struggle-bus my way up the success mountain anymore? The hard work is not over, oh no it's just beginning, but the cloud of anxiety and fear is completely gone.

I trust myself. I see myself as a leader, and I am so incredibly proud of myself for listening to my gut almost a year and a half and signing up to be a Beachbody coach. I had no idea what I was getting myself into and had to do two months of Googling and research to convince myself this wasn't just a scam, but all the time there was this spark deep inside that was saying yes yes yes, go go go, fly fly fly despite my rational brain telling me this was a crazy stupid idea.

Good thing I've learned how to listen to my intuition because it led me to Nashville last week and my life will never be the same. The last ties holding me back have been chopped to pieces and I'm not letting fear or uncertainty keep me from sharing my story and building this business.

I drove down to Nashville from Chicago last Wednesday with my friend and roadtrip buddy Katie to attend our first Beachbody Coach Summit with seven of the coaches I personally mentor! I think it was the last major trip of my poor '03 Ford Focus that's seen me back and forth to Pennsylvania, Baltimore, and Oregon, ha.

Coach Summit is the annual Beachbody conference and convention, and it has grown over the past few years to 25,000 coaches. There are live workouts with the celebrity trainers, training workshops, keynote sessions, recognition celebrations, and parties. It's a chance for corporate to announce new products and tools, and most of all a time for coaches to bond with their teams! One of my favorite parts of coaching through Beachbody is that we're all independent small business owners, but we're part of a network of other coaches so we never feel alone.

Eight coaches representing my team Inspire Joy, which is now 100 coaches strong!

We've only been coaching anywhere from three to 17 months, a brand new baby team, and I don't think any of us knew what to expect. We arrived with wide eyes and open hearts, and a shared desire to re-ignite our spark for the work we do, sharing our stories and fitness journeys to inspire and encourage other women to get started and believe in themselves too.

We literally took over the entire city. All the workshops, sessions, and opening and closing celebrations were held in the Music City Center (biggest convention center I have EVER seen!), Bridgestone Arena, and the NFL football stadium!

We worked out, went out, learned, grew, bonded, survived off of Shakeology, snacks, and BBQ, and way less sleep than we needed.

One of the most unique experiences was shopping at the "Core," which was like a Beachbody mall full of the latest products and apparel that haven't been released to the public yet. I snagged a copy of Autumn's new 21 Day Fix cookbook, Fixate!

It was also really cool to see my name on the "Leadership Ladder" as a team leader. I still can't really believe I've grown my business into the top 500 out of over 350,000 coaches, thanks to the hard work of my team!

I feel like for the past year we've been doing our best, but we haven't had a focused drive. I know that Summit was the turning point for all of us and I'm so excited to see what we can do now that we have the training and motivation to push ourselves :) Ultimately I want myself and our team to be known as leaders in the network, and it's so exciting to watch our journeys unfold as individual coaches and as a team working together.

My main take-aways from my first Coach Summit

+ I need to hold myself accountable to my goals and dreams.

+ Growth takes TIME and success takes discipline. You have to be willing to do the work!

+ Leadership means putting your team first, and being the first one to step into the unknown. 

+ Recognition is critical. (Look out, challengers and coaches...)

+ You can't just flip a switch to be happy and successful. You have to intentionally program yourself to BELIEVE you can lead.

+ Don't let your fear or ego keep you from helping someone.

+ If you don't plan your time, someone else will design your life.

+ Having a vision means having a crystal clear sense of what the future looks like, with no sense of how long it will take.

I could probably write a separate blog post about every single one of those statements. Maybe I will!

Most of all, I'm realizing that I've never been happier in my entire life. I'm on the other side of fear, and now I get to guide women through the journey to discover their own version of this kind of happiness.

The happiness that isn't dependent on external circumstances, but the kind that comes when you accomplish things you never thought possible, when you follow your heart, take risks based on your intuition, find your voice, and believe in the inherent value of your dreams.

Yeah, I'm definitely high on life right now after this major rah-rah trip, but I'm also realizing that I have a choice how I feel and how I react to my experiences. I can choose to ride this wave and make it my everyday reality. I can choose to get focused, get to work, continue to put my story out there, continue to help other women, and end up creating a life of financial freedom and success I never even considered just one year ago when I was still working for a non-profit.

Last summer there was a desperate energy burning inside of me as I was hustling my brains out trying to get to the point where I could quit my job, and that energy is back but it feels different. It's not desperate or fearful anymore. It's clear and bright, because I know what I'm capable of and I'm not working for my own dreams anymore--I'm working for the dreams of my coaches and my challenge group members, and for YOU. I've already met my potential, I've danced and flirted with her, she has terrified me with her enormous power and beauty and wisdom.

Now I'm ready to rise, surrender, and let it flow. That's what coaching has given me. The opportunity to be myself.

I get to inspire joy.

xo Anna

p.s. Are you curious how you can get involved? You can join my health and fitness accountability group here, and learn more about my team Inspire Joy HERE! I'm in this for you babe, and I can't wait to hear your story.