Do you ever let yourself look back at where you've been and how far you've come?
It's funny to revisit this time last year. Literally one year ago to this day, January 28th, we were deep in the middle of the Polar Vortex and I was dealing with the same mid-winter "what am I doing with my LIFE!?" introspection.
So much has happened since then, so much has changed, and yet so much is still the same.
This time last year I was struggling to balance my full time job with my dreams of turning my Etsy shop into a thriving handmade business. I had no idea that Beachbody was about to drop into my lap and completely change the trajectory of my life. Over the past year I've grown into myself, I have a clear and exciting vision for my future, but my Etsy shop is still always on the poor backburner, haha! But in the meantime I've learned so much about running and marketing a small business, and this year I promise I'm going to make good on my intentions! Although I think I'm still going to view the shop as a passion project on the side instead of pressuring myself to turn it into something too huge to handle.
Anyway, this January has been a month of huge and transformative personal growth.
I've struggled and battled to gain clarity on exactly what I want to accomplish this year, and even though most of the time I feel like I'm running as hard as I can just to stay in place, I know I'm also making huge strides and progress in my confidence and vision for my life and career.
When I look back on January 2015, here is what I will remember.
Endless bowls of fancy oats to warm up chilly mornings.
Pushing myself past my mental, emotional, and physical limits every single day with Shaun T's Insanity Max 30 (although I must admit I actually miss my early morning gym adventures! Working out from home while you work from home is awesome, but my hermit tendencies are starting to get to me).
Fueling and nourishing my body with enormous salads and allllllll the veggies.
Finding balance and rewarding myself with my favorite treats! Wine, milk stouts and chocolate porters, mugcakes. I'm happy Ben and I finally checked out the Map Room, it's adorable and brings me back to my grad school days as a geographer!
We joined a church! I started to make pillows, a sewing project I've been putting off for way too long. Ben bought a new car and I discovered the amazing and wonderful Andrea Owen whose blog, podcast, and book are helping me joyfully accept myself for who I am and lay off the internal pressure!
During the first half of the month I was obsessed with planning, reflecting, goal setting, and organizing. I developed and hosted my first ever coach training workshop for the new members of my team, I started to create a new vision for my monthly accountability Bootcamps, and I blogged more thanks to this amazing editorial planner from By Regina. I've slowly started to develop monthly and quarterly goals that align with my core desired feelings. This is a hard process and I'm balancing my inner overachiever with my determination to live more intentionally and find joy in life instead of being constantly overwhelmed. I feel like I'm literally bursting with energy and inspiration and I have a desperate desire to write more, share more, and embrace my journey in all its messy glory. 2015 is the year I will grow into myself, and I'm so excited for what's in store!
I've always struggled with insecurity, fear, perfectionism, and feeling like I'll never be "enough," and this was the month I started to recognize and confront all those little voices holding me back.
Every day I'm practicing self compassion and I'm slowly accepting myself for who I am, right now. I'm taking action on things that I've been thinking and journaling about for years, instead of letting my perfectionism overwhelm and paralyze me.
I really love how I've been blogging for almost six years now because it's fun to remember where I've come from and recognize what has always been important to me.
In January 2011 I said "I am trying to project self-confidence, optimism, and excitement towards all the unknowns coming up in my life this year, and not stress out too much."
Yup, I'm still me :)
