Anna Maria Locke

Happiness [+venting]

Wednesdays are my favorite day of the week.  All day I only have one class, so I can stay home all morning and work on whatever I want to, then go back to doing whatever I want to all afternoon.  Fall is definitely approaching; I can't BELIEVE September is half over!! It was sunny out today but very cool.  Ever since I got home I have been FREEZING so I am going to make a raspberry tea latte :) 
I also can't believe I have been in school for four weeks already. I feel like I am getting in better shape--it only took me 25 minutes to bike in this morning instead of 30 wooo! (but probably because I stuck to the main road through campus instead of the back roads/sidewalks I usually weave through in an attempt to avoid annoying undergrads aimlessly biking/milling about and the CATA buses that are quite scary when passing your bike on a narrow street).   In a feat of over-achievement I also went for a run around the campus golf courses this evening, probably the highlight of the day!  I discovered a gravel path that goes farther into the courses and followed it.  It was the best run I've had in weeks (as most of you know I've been battling the MOST ANNOYING hip injury EVER since July), my legs felt amazing instead of sluggish and I actually picked up my slow-jog pace for a tiny bit to get some endorphins ;) and it was surprisingly easy.  Now I have to wait and see how my hip responds to all this extra activity ha.  It was the perfect kind of run weather, slightly breezy and the setting sun backlit all the trees with leaves JUST beginning to turn colors.
On another note, it seems that while I'm out here in my little happyworld, lots of my family and friends have been facing personal and professional issues and have NOT been excited about each day ahead when they wake up.  This maelstrom of stress upsets me too, because I want everyone I care about to be happy when I'm happy (duh), and to figure out "life" so they can be completely satisfied they're doing what they were meant to do. 
Everyone faces set-backs and trials and uncertainty at times, but it is SO important to KEEP PERSPECTIVE always. I wrote those words in huge letters in my journal last year (I wrote a whooole depressing book) because I knew I would sometimes have to kick myself to keep going and remember that each day is only a miniscule fraction of the rest of my life, and if one day sucks, or even lots of days/months/seasons/a phase of life, it's ok because there will be better days eventually to even the bad ones out.  You might not even have realized just how good those future days are if you hadn't battled to reach them.
One other thing I discovered (the hard way!!!) is that you MUST make time for yourself to keep mentally balanced.  This time will not just pop out on its own, either because you are "busy" or because you feel selfish for not thinking of others 24/7, but you have to sacrifice "important" things to fit in some personal time or you WILL go insane and lose your sense of deep-down personal identity.  And cry.  And be no help to anyone else anyways. Nothing is ever more important than a little bit of quality me-time, no matter how many other things are on the to-do list.  That's just the way it is.  So go sing, lift, walk, read, whatever it is that reminds you of who you really are.
[On a third note, more specifically, if you just so happen to have been unfortunately smashed in the face with the obvious truth of a person's true personality that you have been trying to ignore for months and months, just know that your life WILL go on (and will get better!) without them sucking your happiness and good-spirited energy away.]
Whew, that's enough soapbox for the day!